The Power of Positive Communication

Cosmic Faery Tarot Deck

Recently I have noticed, how quickly people fall into the trap of negative communication. It all starts with a little whine, but then it doesn't stop. This can happen among family and friends but also on social media.

Constant complaining, whinging, gossiping, expressing anger, frustration, bitterness, resentment, outpouring of problems and dramas.... The Queen of Swords on a bad day that never ends!

Are you one of these people?

I was once in a relationship, in which I became the go-to counsellor and found myself in a position of having to listen virtually non-stop to all the problems he kept having.

That relationship became so draining that I was totally relieved when it ended.

Don't fall into the trap of perpetual negativity when interacting with others.

On an unconscious level, it also drags you down emotionally while you keep talking yourself into a perpetual state of dissatisfaction.

And the longer you keep being stuck in this negative pattern, it becomes a habit that will be hard to shift.

At this stage, your vibrational energy may be so low that people begin to avoid hanging out with you.

A quick and easy way to improve your happiness is to communicate more positively thus raising your vibrations for the benefit of all.

You may have forgotten how to do this, so here are some ideas:

1. What has inspired you recently?
Talk about what has made you feel good, such as a great book, TV show, experience, a person, a trip.... anything that has made you forget about all your woes and crappiness in the world.

2. What are you grateful for today?
Yes, the usual gratitude exercise. It does work.

3. When thinking or talking about a person you dislike (e.g. a co-worker), what are their positive traits?
If you can't say anything positive, then try not say anything at all.

4. What happened recently that was funny?
Even better, if it involves you. Share a joke. Don't take yourself too seriously. Laughter is often the best medicine.

5. How can you help and encourage others to overcome their issues?
Take time to listen and show a genuine interest to be present for others when they need your support.

Shifting towards positive communication doesn't mean you have to ignore all the things that concern you, but don't let them consume you either.

Share your positive thoughts and stories today. Leave a positive comment below😍

Warmest wishes,

Christiane

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The Six Human Needs

I recently came across Tony Robbins' website, an American life coach and self-proclaimed "catalyst for change and strategist for success". Amongst plenty of useful information and resources, his post about the six human needs on his blog caught my attention.

My first thought was how illuminating it would be to turn it into a Tarot spread / reading, so before I do that, here's a summary of what the six human needs are all about.

Every day we strive to fulfil our basic needs:

1. Certainty: assurance you can avoid pain and gain pleasure ( I would also include here the need for security, stability, a sense of permanence, structure, routine) 
2. Uncertainty/Variety: the need for the unknown, change, new stimuli 
3. Significance: feeling unique, important, special or needed (also: recognition, appraisal)
4. Connection/Love: a strong feeling of closeness or union with someone or something (also: friendships, social interactions)
5. Growth: an expansion of capacity, capability or understanding 
6. Contribution: a sense of service and focus on helping, giving to and supporting others

In order to support and fulfil these needs, we create a multitude of beliefs and take action according to the needs we tend to focus on the most.

So, here's the first question for you to answer:

Which of these six needs do you tend to focus on or value the most?


What motivates you? Which of the six core needs influences your decisions? What is making you tick? 

I'm sure that deep down you already know the answer, but you can use the Tarot to explore this question further. For this purpose, I have chosen two of my personal tarot cards based on my date of birth to explore this question:

Personality Card: The Hermit

Linked to Virgo, the Hermit suggests earthy needs, such as security, stability and certainty, but also the need to delve into the unknown seeking new stimuli and variety. 

Zodiac Card: The Moon

According to the Moon, linked to my sun sign Pisces, I am more inclined to focus on uncertainty and variety than anything else. Fluctuations, drifting, restlessness are key traits of the Moon and of my life so far. 

Interestingly, both Virgo and Pisces are mutable signs. People born under or influenced by mutable signs tend to be adaptable, flexible, going with the flow, resourceful and versatile, but they can also be volatile, unpredictable and feeling insecure at times. 

My focus on uncertainty/variety has come as a bit of a surprise to me. I always thought I tend to base most of my life choices on certainty and love/connection, but this isn't so. In fact, for some of my most important decisions I have relinquished certainty and love/connection for the sake of variety. 

What are the ways (good and bad) you meet these needs? For example, in your relationships, work, eating, exercise, etc.?


Again, answer this question before you consult the Tarot and then compare notes. 

Personally, I meet my needs by moving on after a while; I've moved countries, had numerous jobs in different disciplines (and I still do a variety of jobs today!), long-term relationships haven't worked for me so far, enjoy a variety of hobbies and interests, always want to learn something new, do something different, and even my taste buds have changed quite radically over the years.

The pip cards relating to my zodiac card The Moon are the Eight, Nine and Ten of Cups. The Eight of Cups in particular highlights the way I meet my needs - letting go and moving on to seek new pleasures, which I enjoy for a while and then move on again. I suppose I get bored so easily... *sigh*

How can you increase your focus on growth and contribution? What are some things you can do, or new experiences you can participate in?

Many people tend to avoid focusing on growth, because it is often linked to loss, endings and pain. It can be easier to stick with what you know and what you're accustomed to, but it can leave you in a position of living your life on auto-pilot, compromising on integrity and not fulfilling your true potential. That's why so many people are stuck nowadays.

Although I have no problems participating in new experiences, I may actually need to turn them into growth, be more aware of lessons learned and apply them in order to stop drifting.

Using the Tarot for further guidance, you can either explore the pip cards of your zodiac card further, or you can draw a card from your deck.

I have drawn the Queen of Swords as a random message and advice card.

The Queen of Swords is asking me to use my intellect rather than emotions when making decisions, value my independence more, use my perceptive skills to see more clearly rather than being too trusting, and getting straight to the point rather than trying to be diplomatic. I also need to get super clear on what I REALLY want, quite literally making a list of specifics rather than being vague.

The Queen of Swords is also asking me to contribute with knowledge, wisdom and fairness by using my teaching and organisational skills. I have already been doing this for many years not just in work but also in my personal and social life, but I know there is always more I can do, and more consciously, too.

Now over to you.

You can ask additional questions, such as

• Which needs do you tend to neglect or avoid, and why?
• What can you do to nurture those needs?

Exploring your core needs is particularly useful when important life choices have to be made, whilst experiencing major change and transition, and at times of stress and feeling overwhelmed.

Take your time when doing this work to gain more clarity on your true purpose, ambitions, goals and ultimately to know thyself.

Warmest wishes,

Christiane



All Tarot images: Aquatic Tarot

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I am Your Fantasy - A Tarot Poem

I am your fantasy,

your escape from reality.

You only know part of me,

my worst you will never see.

One night a week

you embark on a trip of shame

to experience ecstasy

in a haven away from tedious fidelity.

Those few precious moments you live in the present,

a long way from homely mundanity

feeling the thrill of slow surrender,

drowning in the sea of love infinity.

Imagining a new life with the lover you hardly know,

except every inch of her body,

far away from judgement and false morality,

in a parallel universe, just you and me.

Discarding all you once loved happily

in exchange for sexual alchemy.

Hoping for the flame to burn forever,

determined to fall from grace causing calamity.

But stop. I am reminding you now, right here

that I am just your muse and fantasy.

Your temporary escape from reality.

I will never let you see the worst of me.

For one day the tides will turn, change on its way,

nothing ever stays the same,

turning fantasy into reality and a new mundanity

will be the end of you and me.

All images: 

Tarot of Vampyres, (c) Ian Daniels 2010, Llewellyn Publications

Connect with me on:

Substack - Live more Magic

Medium - Simplify your Life

Ko-Fi - Creative Tarot Journaling

Cosmic Spirit Tarot and Wellness