Showing posts with label overcoming fears. Show all posts
Showing posts with label overcoming fears. Show all posts

Saturday, 12 September 2015

Why Your Fears Can Be Blessings

why your fears can be a blessing
Face your Fears - Tarot of Quotes

My Ascendant is Gemini.

The corresponding Minor Arcana cards for this zodiac sign are the Eight, Nine and Ten of Swords, and the Knight of Swords...

I have lived with the energies of those cards since I was a young child, when my parents left me at home alone at times and I started developing a fear of abandonment.

Anxiety has been my middle name ever since.

It has affected me profoundly, and only now in my midlife years am I beginning to come to terms with it.

Sometimes I can ignore it, at other times I can control it, and then at bad times it can be pretty much overpowering.

But fears are not there to be shoved under the carpet.

If you find yourself worrying about the worst catastrophes that may or may not happen to you, then embrace them as blessings.

Why?

Those fears teach you lessons.

They make you aware that anything can happen at any time. Just go with the flow and surrender to those possibilities.

They show you an alternative life and ask you to remind yourself of your strength and ability to cope.

Those fears tell you that if the worst happens, you are stronger than you think.

They ask you to imagine yourself rebuilding your life, and despite tragedy you can and will experience happiness again.

Whatever your fears are, be grateful for them. Embrace them as your guides rather than being paralysed by them. They prepare you for the unexpected and unwanted.

Nobody wants to experience illness, death, poverty or heartache, but when blows like this hit you (and they will sooner or later), use your fears to make you strong rather than helpless.

When you begin to accept the possibilities of a worst case scenario, the power that your fears have over you will start to fade.

Sometimes your fears teach you to be cautious; they stop you from walking naively into a disaster zone.

Fears are useful to help you evaluate your options and realise that at times it's okay to take a risk to live life fully.

A phobia can be paralysing, severely restricting your life, but rather than imagining yourself screaming and passing out when put into that situation, picture yourself laughing and saying to yourself what was all that fuss about? 

Imagine the exhilarating freedom you will gain, when open spaces let you breathe deeply, and a plane journey takes you to new and exciting destinations.

It takes time to rewire your brain to focus on the positive rather than the frightening negative. Don't give up. Keep going.

Affirmations do work, if you keep using them.

You can ask the cards for guidance, too, by exploring questions such as

  • If the worst came to pass, what new opportunities would come up for me?
  • What good will come from it?
  • What unexpected positive experience will I have as a result?
  • How can I stay strong and pursue happiness in difficult times?

Walk with your fears, make peace with them and let them give you wings.


Christiane

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Thursday, 14 June 2012

Giving Up The Habit Of Worrying

giving up the habit of worrying nine of swords aquatic tarot
 Aquatic Tarot © Andreas Schröter 
The Nine of Swords is all about worrying, anxieties and fears.

It's obvious when looking at the image: the woman seems to have just woken up from a nightmare, the background is pitch black, no glimmer of light, as if all hope and optimism has been lost.

The suit of Swords relates to the element air, which is associated with the mind, logic, reason and intellect.

The pattern on the blanket is a combination of a red rose and the symbols of the zodiac air signs, which suggests that anxiety is created in the mind based on emotional attachments.

Emotions can be irrational, and as a result worries and fears can be irrational, too:

"I've suffered a great many catastrophies in my life. Most of them never happened." - Mark Twain 

This quote sums me up quite nicely. When I was in my twenties, I suffered badly from anxiety, caused by irrational fears about illnesses (in my imagination I suffered from the most horrific incurable conditions), fears about the future (as a student I worried, if I would ever get a job and earn a living), fear of flying, fear of eating British beef.....

Hey! 25 years on, and I'm still alive despite some health issues, managed to get a couple of well-paid jobs along the way, but I was also unemployed a few times (worrying about "Will I ever get another job?"). British beef hasn't made me gone mad yet...so far, and I know now that all those horrible feelings of anxiety in my early adult years were a waste of time.

Let's face it: worrying serves us no purpose other than to make us feel tense and miserable, especially when we worry about things beyond our control.

"Worry, like a rocking chair, will give you something to do, but it won’t get you anywhere." - Vance Havner

Instead, focus on generating kind and optimistic thoughts, so life can begin to flow into more positive directions. Focus on creating the life you want, rather than creating fears.

Try this:
"I keep the telephone of my mind open to peace, harmony, health, love and abundance. Then, whenever doubt, anxiety or fear try to call me, they keep getting a busy signal - and soon they'll forget my number."  - Edith Armstrong

It is true that most worries and fears are blown out of proportion. Many people worry too much, because they think too much. Over-thinking is a bit like over-eating; the heaviness makes it impossible to remain light and flexible.

"No man ever sank under the burden of the day. It is when tomorrow's burden is added to the burden of today that the weight is more than a man can bear." - George MacDonald

feel the fear and do it anyway
If you worry a lot, then this book
might help you
When people have negative thoughts regularly, they gradually become attached to them. Negative thoughts become a habit, and it's so damn hard to get rid of any kind of habit you have nurtured for so long.

What is the solution? 

Learn to detach yourself from negative thoughts. Detachment is letting go; acknowledge your worries and fears, but then release them, like soap bubbles that float up and away into the sky.

Think for a moment why you harbour these anxieties; do you need attention or reassurance? I needed lots of reassurance (=attention?) on a regular basis.

But one day I realised that reassurance was like a drug feeding my habit of fear.

I stopped asking for reassurance.

The trick is to break the cycle, stop feeding the fear...stop paying it attention...not letting it rule my life. Feeling the fear and doing it anyway.

I decided I have to let life take its course. Whatever will be, will be.

I went cold-turkey. It was tough, but I started to keep myself busy with adventures and creative projects that I enjoyed and helped me grow (yes, Tarot was part of that, too ;))

"Loneliness, insomnia, and change: the fear of these is even worse than the reality". - Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966 

Remember that when real difficulties crop up in your life, you will be stronger and more resilient than you think. Real difficulties, unlike the imaginary ones, can be overcome. 

Life isn't always a smooth ride. Something bad can happen tomorrow, next week or whenever, but it's beyond my control, there is nothing I can do about it except withdrawing from life, and I don't want to do that.

Nurture a desire to be free from negative thoughts:

"Fear can keep us up all night long, but faith makes one fine pillow."  - Philip Gulley

Let go and know that all will be well. Trust that life will take care of you. Have faith.

Don't let fears hold you back!

Warmest wishes,

Christiane


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