Trump and The Wheel of Fortune

Tarot of Quotes

Life is like Star Wars: First there is A New Hope (back in 2008), then last week The Empire Strikes Back, but hopefully in four years time we can welcome The Return of the Jedi.

Sometimes the dark side wins. We have to face that. Life never runs smoothly.

If you are upset about the result of the US presidential election, then I don't want to make it look better than it is by saying It's going to be okay, because it probably won't.

The global year card for 2017 is the Wheel of Fortune, which coincides with Trump's inauguration. Our luck will change, for better or for worse, and it's likely to be a rough ride ahead.

If you feel disillusioned, give yourself time to let it pass, and then get to work to ensure that the Jedi will return. Because that's the way the Wheel of Fortune works.

We get thrown into the deep end, but it's up to us how we get out of it. The way to do it is not to resign to fate but take positive action.

Here are some ideas:

1. Reassure those people around you, who are afraid of how they might be affected by the new leadership. Let them know you stand by them and will speak up for them.

Give them a hug. Make sure they feel supported. Keep in mind you are powerful, because you are part of the majority, who voted for the other side. You are not alone.

2. Don't let anyone tell you to "get over it" and stop expressing your thoughts. You have the right to voice your opinion whenever you like as we live in a free democracy. The opposition won't shut up about it, and neither should you.

3. Take regular breaks from news and social media. You don't need to read or listen to all that shit hitting the fan right now. Most of it is speculation anyway, so it's a waste of time worrying about it now.

4. Whatever you do, don't lose hope. Remember, the Wheel of Fortune keeps turning. Nothing ever stays the same, and you can be part of influencing the change process. Your input can make a difference even on a small scale.

When the result was announced in Europe on the 9th November, it was a poignant moment, because on the same day 27 years ago, the Berlin Wall came down.

Equally poignant, the same day was also the 78th anniversary of Kristallnacht, the night in Germany when Jewish shops and synagogues were burnt and Jewish citizens murdered.

The Wheel of Fortune keeps turning. Today you may feel like you stand in its shadow, but by not giving up you will rise up into the sun once again.

It will take time and effort, but hey, let's do it.

Warmest wishes,

Christiane


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How To Embrace The Aries Full Moon Energies

Cosmic Faery Tarot - Major Arcana

When the moon is full, its power and energy is at its peak. On the 16th October, there will be an Aries full moon, and Aries is linked to the Emperor in the Tarot.

So what does this card teach you about the Aries energies we are going to experience around this month's full moon?

Here are some ideas how you can embrace the Aries full moon energies:

1. Begin again

Aries is the first sign in the horoscope and the messenger for spring (in the Northern Hemisphere).

Springtime means starting afresh and new growth after having released the old in previous months.

So, the Aries full moon may ask you to move onwards and upwards in your life, finally letting go of negative habits, toxic people etc.

Once you turn your back on what's draining you, you will notice how your energy levels, vitality and inner strength will increase.

2. Be a leader

The Emperor is obviously a leader, and perhaps now is the perfect time for you to take up his role and lead, not only others but your own life, too.

Don't follow others, but create your own rules, boundaries and visions you desire and feel inspired by.

It's a great time to be assertive and get areas of your life back in order you may have neglected or even let go out of control.

3. Take action

Aries and the Emperor are pioneers and adventurers. They love conquering, too, especially things that seem difficult and perhaps overwhelming.

They don't get intimidated, so whatever task or situation you need to resolve and have procrastinated about so far, now is the time to grab the ram by its horns and see it through.

Tarot of Quotes

4. Get sporty and creative

Aries is also linked to the Queen of Wands in the Tarot. She reminds you to get more in touch with your creative side, follow your passions and keep active.

If you do any sports at the time around the Aries full moon, you may have more energy and achieve better results.

Beware of too much coffee, alcohol or other stimulants at this time, as their effects can be intensified in a kind of hyperactive way :)

5. Keep your Ego in check

Well, the Emperor can overstep his mark with arrogance, self-centredness, jealousy and over-control at times. Watch out for these negative traits to creep up on you without otherwise noticing.

Be more mindful about how you react to and deal with people. Make sure you are grounded and stay calm at times when you feel anything but.

Would you like to learn more about how to apply astrology and the moon phases to your tarot work? Check out my Tarot Astrology Self-Study course and my Tarot Moon Journal.

Warmest wishes,

 Christiane

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After The Breakup - Is My Ex Happy?

Letting go and moving on
is all in the mind.

If I said no, would that make you happy?

If I said yes, would that hurt you?

This is one of the few questions I refuse to answer as a professional Tarot reader, because I don't feel that answering it would be of any value to you.

Firstly, you are asking about someone else, rather than paying more attention to yourself and your well-being.

Secondly, the answer is limited to yes or no. 

Thirdly, I can feel your pain of your separation from your ex, and by supporting your obsession with him or her by answering this question, I won't help you heal and move on.

I don't want to earn money this way. Instead, I am giving you my answer here, free of charge.

When someone asks me this question, it is unlikely they ask about their ex from the goodness of their heart.

When a relationship breakup still feels raw and painful, all you wish for is for the other to feel the same.

In fact, if you got dumped, or you finally freed yourself from a narcissist, all you can think of is cursing that individual and send all the ill will you can muster up their way.

But there is a more powerful and healing alternative: 

Learn to not give a shit about that person.

Don't care.

Learn to be indifferent.

Ignore them. No contact. Focus entirely on yourself and your recovery and healing.

This is a process, and you need to focus all your determination on this. 

While you are working on your personal growth, enjoying life and prepare yourself for new opportunities, consider my two answers to your question.

Is my ex happy?

1. Yes

He or she may have left you for someone else, so s/he will be elated. They will probably have great sex, and they may even get married and have kids. Happy-ever-after. 

Accept it. Get over it.

Would this answer make you feel any better? Probably not, so why keep torturing yourself?

It is now down to you to follow your own dreams and aspirations, to make the most of your life without forever pining for what you have lost. 

Your future is ahead, and you can choose, if your journey is miserable or fun.

2. No

They are as miserable and depressed as you are. They have had nothing but bad luck since your relationship ended. They now have doubts and wish they could get back together with you. 

Would this kind of answer encourage you to get in touch with them again? 

The last thing you want is a boomerang relationship that will prolong the agony over months, perhaps even years ahead.

Here's what you can do instead:

• When it's over, accept it's over.
• Rather than following your emotions, explore why your relationship didn't work out. There are some good reasons for it. Don't ignore them, and learn your lessons, so you won't make the same mistake again.
• Engage into some serious self-care. Book yourself on a course, do yoga classes, re-connect with friends, rebuild your life.
• Keep focusing your thoughts on yourself, and be committed to your well-being. Avoid any kind of drama, e.g. confrontations, stalking, trying to get answers, closure, etc. Just let go.
• Embrace change. You can download my manifesting change healing cards for free.
• Get creative - read, write, paint, craft. Get together with like-minded souls to learn and experience new skills.
• Always remember the bad times you had with your ex, which were a reason you split up. 
• Don't initiate any contact with your ex, and try not to fall for their soppy messages of remorse. Your mind is telling you that it's all a load of b**locks. Heed its advice and stay strong.

Most of all, don't obsess over your ex. Don't torture yourself with painful questions about their whereabouts or happiness. It's no longer your concern. 

You are the most important person in your life right now, together with family and friends, who are close and support you.

Trust that you will feel better soon, and you can heal and rebuild your life. 

Warmest wishes,

Christiane

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When Your Relationship Needs A Boost

Tarot of Quotes

"A relationship is a three-part journey: First there's infatuation. Then there's conflict – the part where most people jump ship. The third part is becoming an active participant in your partner's feelings, and that's the method to the madness."
- Alanis Morissette

This is one of my favourite quotes about how relationships work, and it is true that many people go their separate ways during the conflict phase.

Conflict doesn't necessarily mean heated arguments and slamming doors. Quite the opposite.

It is usually smouldering resentment towards the other's annoying habits and personality traits that drives couples apart.

Things are no longer the same as they were during the honeymoon period.

Complacency sets in. Masks begin to crumble.

Less quality time spent together due to work and other commitments. Your partner's irritability and lack of cooking skills annoys you. Less romance, less fun...perhaps no romance or fun at all...

Now is a good time to take stock and make amends.

The honeymoon period always ends, but there is much that can be done to keep the spark alive and move onwards to stage three. 

Although you are aware of the obvious reasons why you are not as happy together as you used to be, you can explore what is going on in your relationship on a deeper, unconscious level. 

Here is a five-card spread you can try:

1. What is the underlying current energy of the relationship?

2. What needs to be addressed?

3. What is going well?

4. What is being neglected?

5. What will improve the relationship?

Cosmic Journaling Oracle

I have used the Cosmic Journaling Oracle for the sample reading:

1. Journey

There is a sense of longevity and unfulfilled potential. Look back and see how far you have come. Have you been on an eventful journey together? Did you have to deal with external challenges that put you both under stress?

You may now realise that you have encountered some bumps and steep hills along the road, and now it is time to focus more on enjoyable and exciting adventures that are still to come. Make some plans and make it happen.

2. Intention

This card suggests making plans, having a goal or simply paying more attention to each other's needs. Intention also means focus, making a conscious choice and seeing it through. However, it can also mean that intentions haven't been kept.

Perhaps a holiday was cancelled or you didn't go for that romantic meal after all. Even worse, your other half has started smoking again... Look at what you intended to do and why it didn't happen. Is there a pattern that needs to be broken? Talk about it.

3. Sensitivity

Sensitivity as a strength in a relationship offers the gift of empathy and mutual understanding. There is a keen awareness of how the other is feeling, but it is also important to open up and express your own feelings.

Sensitivity in this position may also suggest that your senses are not letting you down. Trust them, especially when you 'sense' that something isn't quite right and needs to be addressed.

Sensitivity may also remind you to choose your words and actions wisely and carefully in order to avoid unnecessary drama including hurt, anger and defensiveness.

4. Renewal

When renewal is being neglected, it suggests resistance to making changes, perhaps even denying responsibility. There are obstacles preventing you from moving forward, which may include challenging behavioural traits or external challenges like work or family commitments.

How can you encourage renewal in your relationship, so it can evolve? An additional question to ask the oracle!

5. Trust

If trust is an issue in your relationship, you will need to address it in order to make positive changes. You need to explore if your trust issues are justified or based on past experience or irrational worries.

This can also be an issue for your partner, who may not yet feel secure in your relationship.

The best way to build trust is by being totally reliable, open and honest. When you begin to realise that you can count on the other no matter what, this will be a huge step for you in the right direction.

Think about how you can improve mutual trust in your relationship. If you need some inspiration, pull another card.

I hope you will find this spread helpful, either for yourself or a person you are reading for. Please do let me know, how it's worked for you. 

If you would like me to do this reading for you, please choose the 5-card reading option on my Tarot Readings by Email page.

The Cosmic Journaling Oracle is also available as a digital edition with a 30% discount on the printed copy of the deck.

Warmest wishes,

Christiane

Transform your life this year: 

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Making Tarot Journaling More Fun

From: Cosmic Faery's Journal Workbook

Who says keeping a diary or recording your tarot / oracle readings should be done on boring white paper?

There are more creative ways you can make your journal look exciting and inviting.

In order to make it easy for you taking the first step, I have created a wide range of journaling sheets for you to download for free and also to buy. Good news is that there will be many more on the way to cover all sorts of topics.

As you can see from the pics in this post, adding some colour and redesigning the writing space already makes a difference to help you think outside the box.

In addition, using different colour pens, your own doodles, stickers and printed card images you will make your journal truly unique.

There are many different journaling sheets available, for one-, two- and multi-card readings, daily/weekly reflections, gratitude lists etc.

From: Cosmic Journaling Oracle
Digital Edition & Guidebook

The sheets are designed to be flexible; you can also use them to record your favourite quotes, things to do, books to read, films to watch, bucket lists and so much more.

And the best thing about downloads is you can print them again and again to feed your journaling habit.

My latest creation is the digital edition of the Cosmic Journaling Oracle, which comes with a guidebook including printable bonus material such as greeting cards, journaling sheets and cover pages.

The oracle deck has been specifically designed for journaling but also for divination.

Together with the guidebook you can use the cards for self-exploration while creating a unique record of your life journey.

All my printable products have been designed for paper lovers and those who would like to rediscover their passion for handwriting and the real feel of paper (rather than just keeping notes in the digital twilight zone on electronic devices).

From my journaling workbook and the Cosmic Journaling Oracle guide
#cosmicjournaling on Instagram

I'd love to welcome you to the cosmic journaling club. You can make a start with my freebies, and please do let me know how you get on. You can buy my journaling ebooks here.

Warmest wishes,

Christiane



Transform your life this year: 

Tarot Readings - Insightful guidance when you need it
Learn Tarot - A magickal, inspirational tool for life
Tarot eBooks - Great value, innovative Tarot study material

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Cosmic Journaling Oracle - Sensitivity

Cosmic Journaling Oracle

“Highly sensitive people are too often perceived as weaklings or damaged goods. 

To feel intensely is not a symptom of weakness, it is the trademark of the truly alive and compassionate. 

It is not the empath who is broken, it is society that has become dysfunctional and emotionally disabled. 

There is no shame in expressing your authentic feelings. 

Those who are at times described as being a 'hot mess' or having 'too many issues' are the very fabric of what keeps the dream alive for a more caring, humane world. 

Never be ashamed to let your tears shine a light in this world.”
- Anthon St. Maarten

What does sensitivity mean to you? 

Do you feel you need to grow a "thick skin" when people regard you as "highly strung"? 

Or do you embrace your sensitivity in order to stand your ground and take no shit?

Explore your life with the Cosmic Journaling Oracle

Enter the competition on my Facebook Page for a chance to win a copy of this deck.

Warmest wishes,

Christiane


Transform your life this year:

Tarot Readings - Insightful guidance when you need it
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Balancing Darkness and Light

I've succumbed to the new age fad of "adult colouring"
and found that surprisingly relaxing ;)

If you have been reading my blogs for a while, then you know that I am not a member of the "love 'n' light" brigade, constantly churning out sugar-coated new age sound bites about happiness, unconditional love and floating in a state of eternal bliss.

Far from it.

My writings and the work I do are based on my personal experiences of the darkness that exists in my life - endings, loss, bereavement, change, depression, anxiety, insecurities, illness, loneliness.

The love 'n' light brigade keeps telling me to "release" all those things, "let go" or even ignore, but that's easier said than done. How exactly do you "release" depression, feelings of loss or uncertainty?

In reality, dealing with these issues involves a lot of work, which includes acknowledging, facing and embracing the shadow in our lives. It also means admitting to it!

Even in nature, there is no sunlight without the casting of a shadow, no day without night. Light and dark both have a role to play in a holistic and sustainable kind of spirituality, which is the only way to initiate growth, healing and enlightenment (wisdom).

Of course, if you tend to be a pessimist and your thoughts keep revolving around negative aspects in your life, then it is wise to have a reminder once in a while to be more positive, hence "Today focus solely on the positive", a message from my Manifesting Change Cards.

It is very easy to fall into the trap of negativity when having to deal with major change and upheaval.

This card isn't about ignoring reality; it's just asking you to give yourself a break.

I pulled this card yesterday, and as a result I reminded myself of all the good stuff currently going on in my life. Also, the little things around me that give me pleasure.

I had a very productive and positive day, because I knew this wasn't about putting my head into the sand. And lo and behold, at midnight the spell was over, and I woke up early with fears of loneliness in old age....

You may be laughing now, or perhaps you understand. The point is, my spirituality is a mix of love 'n' light and doom 'n' gloom. For me, one can't exist without the other.

If some new age guru tells you to ignore all the shit in your life, then think again.

Denial and ignorance isn't the answer to your problems. There is much you can do to blend both aspects of your life in order to - perhaps paradoxically - be happier and more fulfilled.

Find creative outlets to confront your darkness. Reach out, help others. Divine possibilities and solutions. Your darkness after all may be your driving force to greatness. Use it as a fuel on your journey.

Warmest wishes,

Christiane


Transform your life this year: 

Tarot Readings - Insightful guidance when you need it
Learn Tarot - A magickal, inspirational tool for life
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4 Reasons Why you Are Still Single

Cosmic Journaling Oracle

If you have been single for a while, chances are you wouldn't mind meeting that special someone to love and share your life with.

Unless of course you are totally happy with being single, then you don't need to read any further.

But if you do read on, then you might be wondering, why love seems to persistently elude you.

There can be many reasons, which you may be aware of, but sometimes it can also be down to your unconscious behaviour and state of mind that blocks you from attracting that fulfilling relationship you are dreaming of.

Here are some possibilities:

1. You are bitter and resentful about your past experiences

So many people experience a string of unhappy relationships, and after a while it either makes them start keeping 30 cats, or they become highly cynical about the whole love thang.

Unconsciously they begin to develop a kind of victim mentality, forever going on about how terribly they were hurt, and never wanting to be in that situation again.

If you fit into this category, then I know what you must be going through. I sadly haven't been immune to mistreatment either, but I advise you not to let these people rule the rest of your life in such a negative way.

Slowly you are building an impenetrable wall around you, and the only way you can pull it down again is by accepting what happened, learn from it, forgive those people, and then move on.


2. You are still clinging to your ex

If you are still hoping for your ex to return, then you won't attract anybody remotely suitable for you. That's because unconsciously you are not interested in long-term relationships but short-lived flings to fill the void.

You may also still be grieving for your broken relationship and may make some desperate choices for comfort, which you may later regret.

The best thing to do is accept that your ex is unlikely to come back and release that relationship mentally and emotionally. I know it is hard and it will take a while, but it will help you put closure on the past and open up to new opportunities.


3. You are waiting for Mr. or Mrs. Perfect

The basic ingredients for a long-term relationship is mutual attraction, chemistry, trust and respect. It's also important that you share same interests (at least a few) and values. On that foundation you can develop long-term love and commitment.

But do they really have to have a university degree like you? Or have lots of money? Or a job that your parents (or your peers) approve of?

Whatever you are looking for in your next relationship, by all means make a priority list, but don't dismiss someone, only because they don't tick one of the ingredients on your wishlist.

Think carefully about what is most important to you, but don't make that list so long that it will be hard for anyone to fulfil.

Explore, where you could compromise and still make it work. This isn't about "settling" for second best but discovering the hidden gems in a potential relationship and the all-important give and take.


4. You are desperate

It's been so long since your last relationship that you have stopped discerning the wheat from the chaff, and you are looking at every man or woman you meet as a love potential.

This can make you act in strange ways, like getting too close to someone you talk to at a social event, drink too much, offer your phone number etc. without noticing that they are just not interested in you.

And when you do get the chance for another date, then you keep getting in touch with them too often, and basically on an unconscious level you just exude desperation, which sadly is terribly unattractive.

Cool down. Step back. Relax. There is a better way how you can attract love into your life without trying too hard.

That doesn't mean you have to crawl into a shell and stop socialising. Instead, enjoy meeting new people and see them as potential friends rather than anything more. This way you build your social network, and who knows, one of them might be rocking your boat at one point in the future.

Cosmic Journaling Oracle

Always trust the process and know that love will come your way when you least expect it.

Questions you could ask the Tarot:

1. What blocks have I created that hinder me from finding new love?

2. How can I overcome them?

3. What else can I do over the next four weeks to invite new love into my life?

If you love using the Tarot to explore your love issues, then you may enjoy using my Tarot & Spirituality workbook containing some insightful spreads and activities for self-development and personal growth.

For more articles on love and relationship topics, click here.

And if you would like a reading for personal guidance, I am here for you.

Warmest wishes,

Christiane


Transform your life this year: 

Tarot Readings - Insightful guidance when you need it
Learn Tarot - A magickal, inspirational tool for life
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The Cosmic Journaling Oracle - Awakening

Cosmic Journaling Oracle

The Cosmic Journaling Oracle isn't quite like other oracle decks out there.

It doesn't tell you how to interpret each card, it asks you to write your own story. That's why the word 'journaling' is part of its name.

The Cosmic Journaling Oracle invites you to create your own meanings for each card by exploring your life from one card to the next - from awakening to completion.

Pick a card and see what memories, ideas and emotions are triggered. Write about them.

The divination aspect of this deck lies in the random draw of a card, which asks you to pay attention to this particular topic.

You can also use the cards to answer specific questions, no problem at all. But before you do that, spend some time with the cards to make a connection, and you will notice how spookily accurate the messages and even predictions may turn out.

Awakening - I'm not telling you how this card should fit into your life or indeed how you should define or interpret it.

This is my personal story about Awakening, and yours may be similar or totally different, and that's the beauty of an oracle deck, which doesn't limit the card meanings to the creator's personal world.

Here, my story about Awakening only acts as an example of how you can work with each card of the deck.

Awakening - the moment I began to realise that after years of stagnation something was stirring inside me. My Awakening moments occurred at times of great change, grief and loss.

After one such event many years ago, I picked up my Tarot deck again after years of abandonment. There it was in my hands again, and the rest is history.

The very first time I came in contact with Tarot was when I felt overwhelmed by life's uncertainty with a lack of direction, when I was a student at university in the early 1980s.

By chance I joined a women's circle at the campus and looked with curiosity through a Tarot deck one of the women brought along. I was wondering, how fortune-telling could possibly work, and I wanted to know.

Awakening.

The urge to go on a magickal quest was always inside me, but it had to be ignited by a spark.

Just like a phoenix rising from the ashes, after years of lying dormant, a spark ignites the spirit lifting up body and soul.

It's a wake-up call.

In my readings, I interpret Awakening as transformation about to occur, which will bring growth and expansion.

In a relationship reading, this could mean meeting someone, who will change your life, or an existing relationship is being examined due to new insights or developments.

For a single person, Awakening can mean being clear about standards, values, sexual preferences and expectations, therefore avoiding unsuitable, even emotionally harmful relationships.

In work and career matters, it can mean a calling, vocation, change of direction.

Awakening leads to something new and therefore personal growth.

What is your story of Awakening?

The Cosmic Journaling Oracle will be available in March 2016 as a digital download and shortly after as a printed deck.

In the meantime, you can explore Tarot Journaling with my ebook.

Warmest wishes,

Christiane


Transform your life this year: 

Tarot Readings - Insightful guidance when you need it
Learn Tarot - A magickal, inspirational tool for life
Tarot eBooks - Great value, innovative Tarot study material

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How to Include Tarot in Your Daily Spiritual Practice

"Daily spiritual practice??!!!" I hear you say with shock in your voice. "Sadly, I don't have time for this."

Are you sure you don't have just ten minutes in a day for yourself?

There's no need to do an elaborate 10-card Celtic Cross reading every day to ground yourself and clear some mental clutter.

Instead, you can use a simple one-card reading for daily insight, reflection and guidance, which will take you no more than ten minutes of your time.

If you find it difficult to meditate the traditional way by sitting in the lotus position, closing your eyes and trying to think of nothing, then perhaps journaling can help you unwind more easily instead.

Here's how to do it:

Self-reflective meditation is best done first thing in the morning or last thing at night depending when it suits you best.

The morning meditation sets you up for the day. You look ahead setting your tasks and explore what you may need to pay attention to.

The evening meditation lets you reflect on the day just passed, and you can include favourite moments, lessons learned and achievements.

In both cases it is important to write it all down in your journal. Writing is a wonderful tool for grounding, focus, problem solving and healing.

All you need to do is draw one card from your deck and make some notes. What to include in a one-card reading? Find out here.

My morning routine involves getting up before my son does at 7.00 am and making coffee. With my favourite wake-up drink I sit at my desk and pull a card and make some notes according to my checklist.

Later in the day when I glance at my notes again, I often notice how my thoughts and mindset recorded in my journal have influenced me during the day.

My fauxdori journal filled
with cosmic journaling sheets

Recently I have been doing more and more evening reflections.

I quite literally do them in bed all cosy under my blanket, with my favourite Tarot deck and fauxdori journal containing journaling sheets I created especially for this purpose.

If the daily evening reflection appeals to you, you can download a cosmic journaling sheet in two sizes:

Evening Reflection A4 - for your ring binder. Two pages to be printed double-sided.

Evening Reflection A5 - designed to print double-sided to fold into a booklet or use as traveler's notebook (fauxdori) inserts.

For the evening reflection you can draw a card in the morning, record it on your sheet, and in the evening you can journal about how it has panned out during the day.

Try the various options and see which one suits you best, and please do let me know about your Tarot journaling habits. I'd love to hear from you!

Warmest wishes,

Christiane


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Women, Know Your Worth!

Angels, Gods and Goddesses Oracle
(c) Toni C. Salerno 2003 

Having done so many Tarot readings addressing love and relationship issues over the years, I have noticed a distinct pattern: how women so readily settle for shitty relationships.

Yes, they are treated like shit and think that's normal or okay.

Women have the tendency to blame themselves for the way they are treated, and to a certain extent they're right.

They let it happen, because they think they shouldn't make a drama, complain or make some other kind of fuss.

Most likely, they'd be accused of being highly strung or having hormonal problems, and no woman wants to give that impression or have that reputation.

But here's the deal: women have to learn to set firm boundaries based on self-love; they need to realise their worth and make their relationship choices accordingly. And expressing emotions doesn't equal drama or PMT.

Here are some of the ill-treatments women put up with:

1. Lack of Communication

After weeks of dating and getting closer, suddenly the bloke doesn't get in touch any more. Total silence for days, but then out of the blue he makes contact again as if nothing has happened.

Unless this guy was in a coma or on a secret undercover mission working for MI6, then there is absolutely no excuse for this kind of behaviour, especially when this happens a couple of times.

If this has happened more than once, then it's time to ditch that player for good.

There are men out there, who consciously starve you of communication or time, so you keep wanting them more. Don't fall into this venus fly trap.

2. Two-Timing

I'm not talking cheating here (which of course is bad enough), but the woman actually being aware of another woman he is interested in.

Hello? Are you sure you want to nurture his ego by waiting for him to make a choice between you and the other?

Honestly, please... you don't have time for this. There is someone else out there for you, who would love you with all his heart and wouldn't treat you as an option or a stand-in.

This guy needs a reality check and realise he's not the only man on the planet. Tell him to make do with the other and block him completely out of your life.

3. Ambivalence

If after three months of dating, a man is still floating in and out of your life, prefers gaming, drugs, checking out other women and his mates over you, then it's time to kick that jerk in the butt and say "good riddance".

4. Passive Abuse

Physical abuse is clear-cut zero tolerance, and you should leave that relationship immediately, however, there is also the more subtle psychological abuse, which happens over time and can leave a woman full of self-doubt and with battered self-esteem.

I have written before about toxic relationships, which are emotionally draining and exhausting. They are the most difficult to get out of, because the symptoms tend to appear in a more established relationship, and emotional attachment makes is hard to let go.

Here's a question for you: 

When you stick with a shitty relationship, are you doing it because you want to please the man with your compliance and exceeding tolerance until he realises what a gem you are and changes his ways?

Trust me, he will never change, if you just let this happen to you. By ignoring your needs and not demanding the respect and attention you deserve, you just hand your personal power over to him. You are open to degradation and manipulation.

When women contact me for readings about their relationship issues, I don't know at that point what is going on in their lives, but the cards often tell me that something isn't quite right.

It is then up to me, an objective, neutral person from the outside to waive the red flag and help women recognise what is truly happening to them, and how they can make positive changes.

I urge all women to think about their boundaries carefully and realise that any kind of mistreatment as described above is NOT okay.

Warmest wishes,

Christiane

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The Truth About Soulmate Relationships

Tarot of Quotes

"Why did he leave me? He was my soulmate!" she cried, "Now he says he doesn't love me any more..." *sob*

As a professional Tarot reader, I deal with a lot of questions about love and relationships including "When will I meet my soulmate?", as if soulmate relationships were the Rolls Royce of relationships.

But here's the truth: they're not, and I tell you why.

What is a soulmate relationship?

You can find different definitions of a soulmate relationship on the internet, and some even include a karmic /past life connection.

This is my version:

In a soulmate relationship there is a mutual strong and deep love connecting both people for life.

That love will never diminish, and over time it can become all consuming and sometimes even leads to co-dependency without you realising.

It is possible that in a soul mate relationship you gradually lose yourself completely giving up your identity and autonomy. Two people become one, not just in private but in public, too.

So far, not so good.

Of course, deep love and affection is a wonderful thing, and that is one major aspect of a soulmate relationship.

This love lasts a lifetime, so if someone tells you they don't love you any more, then they have never been your soulmate.

Happy-ever-after in a soulmate relationship?

Not necessarily. As mentioned before, this type of relationship can be stifling, and at one point there will be an urge to break out, even if just for a short time.

Two people can evolve over time in different directions, which will not have an impact on the love they feel for each other, but on their ability to stay together.

When soulmates finally split up, they will experience this as difficult and traumatic, because they cannot stop loving the other but also recognise the reason why their breakup is for the best.

There is no guarantee that soulmates stay together for the rest of their lives.

Are other kind of relationships not just second-best?

Not necessarily. As long as they are built on mutual love, commitment, trust and respect, these relationships can equally last a lifetime but without the entangling energy of a soulmate connection.

A lot of successful relationships are NOT soulmate connections; both people in this kind of relationship manage to grow alongside each other, in fact, they help each other grow. They also keep their autonomy and yet are fully committed to each other.

How do you know, if you are in a soulmate relationship?

Although you can feel a strong connection to each other, especially at the beginning of a relationship, only time will tell if you do.

Astrology can also give you a hint as to how you are matched with your significant other. This involves your sun and your moon sign. If your moon sign is the same as your partner's sun sign, then this could indicate a soulmate relationship. If you like, I can do a Tarot Love Match reading for you to explore your compatibility.

When you see an old couple still holding hands in public after 50 years of marriage, they are most likely soul mates. Like I said, time will tell, and initial attraction and a passionate early phase of a relationship is no indication for being soulmates.

What is for sure is that your significant other will never leave you, because they don't love you any more, and vice versa. There can be many different reasons for a breakup, but the love between you would remain forever.

A soulmate relationship usually only happens once in a lifetime, and not everyone experiences one, but that doesn't mean you cannot have fulfilling relationships in your life. 

As you can see, there is no need to aspire to a soulmate relationship, when you can be with someone, who you can be equally happy with, perhaps even happier than you think.

Warmest wishes,

Christiane

Transform your life this year: 

Tarot Readings - Insightful guidance when you need it
Learn Tarot - A magickal, inspirational tool for life
Tarot eBooks - Great value, innovative Tarot study material

Make sure you subscribe to my feed to receive the latest articles straight into your inbox when published.

You can also connect with me on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumbr and Instagram.